These wise words are
shareware
! If you use them for more than 30 days, you must register. Dump $20,00 of cash into an envelope and send it to D-Coy Interactive.
- - Ever stop thinking and forget to start again? * Hospital: A workshop for faulty humans * Drive aggressively. Buy a tank * Dynamic linking error: Your mistake is now everywhere * Shareware? Reminds me of a girl in my high school * She kept saying I didn't listen to her- or something * Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor * Smoke a joint while driving- leave no turn unstoned * Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date * Bits make bytes, but nibbles turn me on * Buy a pentium III so you can reboot faster * PCs are okay except when you use them as bowling balls * I just got a new car for my wife... Great trade! * How do I set my laser pointer to stun? * Human being: An ingenious assembly for portable plumbing * Hunting is no fun when the rabbit has the gun * I am a deeply superficial person * They who drink beer will think beer * They're only trying to make me
look
paranoid * This ain't as good as sex-* but it's safer these days * If it's not on fire, it's a software problem * If life's a stage, I want better lighting * If speed scares you, use Windows * If the good die young, I wonder why I am still here * Any machine must contain at least one part which is obsolete, two parts which are unobtainable, and three parts which are still under development * Save the earth, some of my best friends live there * Sex is not an answer. Sex is a question. Yes is the answer. * Shareware, crippleware, freeware, underwear * I shot an arrow in the air, and it got stuck * I think, therefore I am obviously overqualified * I think I am diagonally parked in a parallel universe * I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken * I tried Linux once, but I didn't inhale * I wasn't kissing her, I was whispering in her mouth * Two is company, three is an orgy * I'm not confused, I'm just well*mixed * I'm writing an unauthorized biography * We now return to our regularly scheduled flame*throwing * If at first you don't succeed, sky*diving isn't for you * If I feel like exercise, I lie down until it passes * What do you mean I need a license to do that? * What if there were no hypothetical situations? * Sure, drinking kills brain cells, but only the weak ones * Gee, I wonder what this key does * Teleportation affects your orientation * The earth is like a tiny grain of sand, only much heavier * Gravity is a myth: the Earth sucks * HaHaHa! Yuk, yuk. Snort. Harumph * Hairy fishnuts, anyone? * The less things change, the more they remain the same * The more you run over a cat, the flatter it gets * Hardware: The parts of a computer that can be kicked * The worst thing about censorship is * Who says I can't have it all? * Is Australia realy down under, or are we upside down? * It isn't easy being green * It looks like an optical illusion, but it isn't * Work is for those who have nothing better to do * World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones * Yesterday I saw a man with a wooden leg, and a real foot * You known you're really old when you stop buying green bananas * Gravity: Not just a good idea, it's the law * Reality is a constant intrusion on my dreams * Recursion: See recursion * All I ask is to prove that money can't make me happy * All probabilities are 50%. It happens or it doesn't. * Most of our future lies ahead * Multitasking allows screwing up several things at once * My brain is my second favourite organ * A chick is an egg's way of making another chick * A hole is nothing, but you can still break your neck in it * Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math * 3 kinds of people: those who can count, and those who can't * A "program" is used to turn data into error messages * A conclusion is where you got tired of thinking * Next time you wave, use
all
of your fingers! * No one should test the depth of a river with both feet * Alzheimer's Club: Meet the same new friends every day * Windows 98: The best $100 minesweeper game you can buy * Instant Human: Just add caffeine, alcohol and nicotine * I just took an IQ test. The results were negative. * I saw a light at the end of the tunnel. A train. * There is no intelligent life down here * A yer ago I kudnt spel pressident now I are wan * I have a 56k modem and 1.5bps fingers * I am perfectly sane, and so am I * Sometimes I sit and think, sometimes I sit and stink * Spaghetti code = job security * Stupid: Being unable to find your own butt in the dark * Today is an excellent time to become a missing person